Attention seeking
Attention seeking - You've probably heard the term. Let's say: literally translated as "attention whore", it is a popular, very common name for a psychological condition. The Russians use the word "вниманьетутка". In Turkey, it is called "mania of interest."
People who want to see themselves in the center of attention, willingly or forcibly, are infected with this "disease". They try to show their talents, or to show off their bodies, or anything that will attract attention, and to send a "follow me" message to those around you, to others, and even to the world. It's as if every "attention seeking" is shouting:
“Take care of me! Look at me! Only to me! ”
For them, it does not matter whether they are insulted, humiliated, trampled on their identity and dignity, they were able to voice all the courageous thoughts that will be subjected to all kinds of swearing, lynching, humiliation and humiliation.
In psychology, this is called "Emphasis on Personality" (Hysteroid, Accentuation), elements such as extreme egocentrism, desire for attention, recognition, respect, admiration, surprise are the most important, important elements for these types. Almost all people engaged in art have traces of this syndrome. They are very afraid that they will not be noticed, that they will not be recognized, that they will be depressed when they realize that they are far from being praised, and that they will be frightened when they hear the sound of approaching painful loneliness. Such types are accustomed to being idols in the family, to being held in their hands, to being pampered, and even to the birth of another child, a brother or sister, is like a painful birth for them.
The real tragedy begins after this: the focus on another child, giving him a new, fresher love, the fresh, untouched grandeur that replaces the old and unnecessary love, is a cause of severe trauma for these types. Often this jealousy ends in practical tragedy, they do not miss any opportunity to ignore the newborn and make plans to destroy it. It would be good for families with such children to ask what they think when they decide to have a new baby. Perhaps the importance of their opinion can play the role of a soothing ointment for those types.
Psychologist Vusala Amiraslanova says that there are some traumas from childhood that affect our future:
“To be loved and accepted by others… Generally, there is a type of need called love. The most important of our 5 types of needs is love and belonging. The loved one thinks he is in the spotlight and finds comfort in it. Women who are unable to get the love they need from their fathers as children grow up in need of boys' love. They try to find themselves in those boys. It also happens to boys: when they are not loved by their mothers, other women look for it. ”
People with this psychological syndrome never want to be noticed by others and consider them their enemies. In fact, these types are very dangerous: they attract you with their sincerity, always show it in a demonstrative way and demand that you love him. Even this demonstrative disease is so strong that if he reacts to you, he can resort to blackmail. For some reason, they may be moved to inspire others, and they may even show courage and help others. However, the biggest problem of these types of demonstrators is that they quickly lose their interest and are unable to stand up to unexpected difficulties. Therefore, they can easily betray their friends, as well as their ideas and the things they are fighting for. These types of people, who see themselves as leaders, gradually lose interest in them, give up their passions, and begin to retreat, fearing that their dreams will not come true.
Psychologist Vusala Amiraslonova notes that we have met such people around us:
He always speaks about himself in the meetings, he says "I did it", "it was my thought", "I knew it", "I know everything" and so on. This, of course, is a serious problem and affects the psyche. They also think of themselves as friends. They listen to him to use the other side. "
In any case, these types of demonstrators are crazy, they want to attract attention to themselves, to gather around them no matter what. Therefore, they are ready to sacrifice their reputation, family, friends and everything in general. Let them stay in their fame, let them win in this way. These types do not like to be alone, they are always based on being chosen as a leader.
There is a more severe version of these types: demonstrative psychopaths. We can briefly interpret them as follows: the desire to look as important as possible, a pathological desire to attract positive attention to the personality.
The most important element for them is to be on top of everything, to be ahead of everyone. In the name of total attention, they may even go out of their way to not recognize anyone else.There are also famous actors in such a difficult situation. Psychologist V. Amiraslonova says that some celebrities use many ways to attract attention: “Either with laughter, or with the way he behaves, or with the difference in the clips he shoots. Let's say we've all seen the differences in Lady Gaga's music videos. When there are many such cases, the situation worsens and can lead to personality disorders.
The achievements of those who suffer from this "disease" are, in short, superficial and simple. They try to make the most of it, keeping it to a minimum. They also often like to speculate about their health.
They are crazy to show, they show around that their advantages and talents are very strong, but in fact, those skills are broken as quickly as a thin rope. Circles of interest are very small. Although their knowledge and intellects are not so deep, they are able to show it often and trap others with this intellect.
These types are prone to flattery, thinking that the easiest way to deceive people and those around them is to flatter them. He likes to join provocative actions, often to put on a "show" at work, at home, on the street and in general, everywhere, and always goes out of his way to prove his talent. To do all this, he gathers people around him and considers it important to create a crowd of people he likes the most and can easily deceive.
In addition to the desire to attract attention, they have the ability to repel a characteristic feature: the ability to erase from their memory traumatic information about events that they do not want the time they need. For example, when this type of person commits a crime, for example, when he commits a crime, he behaves as if he does not know about the crime. Even other wrongdoings can make you believe that he is innocent.
This is why these types, who are always based on intuition in their activities, often fall into a bad situation. The most important tactic and strategy of a psychopath is to rely on his personal qualities. He always pretends to be honest and truthful, and he is able to attract his attention. Moreover, if we add to this ability figurative speech and attractiveness, then it is not so difficult to capture the future. They are tired of talking about others, and when they speak, they use expressions and metaphors that make it difficult for you to understand what they are saying. Honestly, you can't appreciate his attitude: he doesn't say good or bad, he speaks over and over, he never expresses his true opinion. He will be able to listen to you no matter what he says or does. He also has this kind of hypnosis. He gets used to everything quickly, he knows how to behave in all situations, he can play any role and play it "Oscar".
They are trying another way to attract attention: to announce suicide. He says that he will commit suicide from time to time, when he does not believe in it, he writes you a farewell letter, reveals a secret he did not tell, and mobilizes all his efforts to make his suicide convincing.
Their physical appearance has a special place for them, they are always worried about it, they always try to solve it in their brains. They want to hear good words and get a positive opinion about their body. They do not tolerate criticism and will, and when they hear this, they become sensitive and sad. It is these sensitivities that make them want to be influenced by others.
Wearing clothes that create a shock effect, wearing a very eye-catching image, acting crazy, sweetening one's place, getting bored with one's work, leaving work unfinished, making quick decisions and making mistakes, pushing oneself desperately without thinking, leading to fraud in relationships to give - if you have such qualities, then you are one of them.
People with this "disease" are very sensitive and emotional, and often get hysterical. When they attract the attention of others, they become so lovable, funny and interesting. The opposite happens when they feel that they are not being taken care of in a meeting: they sit together with sadness and cold eyes and stand quietly. When the members of the assembly saw his condition, they reluctantly asked, "What happened to you?" they begin to say and unknowingly fall into the trap of the "patient". In fact, the reason these types are sad is very simple: let others see him, feel sorry for him, and ask such questions. When the plan of the "patient" comes true, when the whole assembly is interested in him, the flower bursts, joy and laughter spread to his mouth. At such times, you will have discovered a feature: when these types are leaders, they are very good at human relations, and the profession of treating everyone as a friend is in their nature.
This "disease" mainly occurs during adolescence and is more common in women. The young lady, who always wants to be noticed, is waiting for the confirmation of every word she says, and demands that everyone believe her words. Otherwise, he is offended, offended, hysterical, cries, shouts… And he is aware that he is doing all this with the intention of attracting attention.
Thoughts, as well as feelings, change frequently: minute by minute, second by second. Even to the extent that you can't make sense of this frequent change of feeling, you are confused and ask yourself:
“Why doesn't what he said now coincide with what he said now? ”
We can congratulate you, you have already fallen into the trap of that person and inevitably became interested in him. In fact, this is exactly what he wants: to take you out of your life and make you a guest in his life. Not a guest, but a permanent resident. Because according to them, others have no life, only their own life. He likes to exaggerate all kinds of ordinary events that happen to him, and presents it as such an important event that you yourself will be affected by the story being told. In fact, these events, which can happen to anyone, are a ready plan for them to capture their victim. When this plan doesn't work, he uses additional means: he pretends to be an ape to show the severity of any event he experiences, makes attention-grabbing gestures, shouts, in short, creates a situation where you can believe how horrible he is. Therefore, he owes it to himself to magnify and dramatize everything that happens.
He quickly becomes sincere with the people he has just met (we can also call them victims), hugs him on the first meeting, kisses him, shows compassion and care, and even when he does not eat, he begins to share family secrets with him. Whether you like it or not, you are willing to take care of him and respond to his sincerity. After that, everything goes one-sided: he speaks, you listen, he speaks his sorrows, you are silent. He is always in the foreground, you are in the background. And so he begins to burden you with his life, his sorrows.
They love intimacy in love relationships, they greatly increase their love. They can fall in love and have a relationship with any member of the opposite sex.
According to many people, female "patients" belonging to these types are very attractive, while male "patients" are pleasant and attractive. Others think that they are too busy and that they are good at choking. Carriers of this syndrome spread such pleasant qualities as "friendly", "compassionate", "still burning". Their intentions are not pure, but the purpose of appearing is to be praised. In fact, there is a very sad truth behind their actions: they know that they are not observant, so they feel unhappy, thinking that in order to be happy, other people must be attracted to them and like them. They believe that they have the right to be loved and noticed.
These "patients" sometimes bring narcissists to the same level, saying that they are similar. But the difference is that narcissists generally do not care about anyone but themselves, they do not consider anyone's opinion important to them, and they, on the contrary, aim to attract everyone's attention. Because they are always "playing" around, they never travel to their worlds, they do not realize that they remain as children. Although the exact cause of the disease is not known, it is said that the behavior of parents towards their children will lead to such abnormalities in the future. Psychologist Vusala Amiraslanova says they are like narcissistic types: “The desire for attention and self-interest stems from narcissism. They may be trying to attract attention, take medicine, leave a letter and disappear, or go to the top of the building and shoot themselves. They are manipulating me to do something to myself, if you don't want me to do it, and so on. They do this to gain love, because they cannot meet the needs of love, or to gain greater love. ”
Psychologist Vusala Amiraslanova goes on to say:
"I have had such patients," he said. There are even those who say that they will blackmail their spouses to attract attention. They have always had many difficulties in relationships. Or there were patients who came to me and said that I have nothing. Why should I get treatment? Let someone else come, not me. "
There are definitely people around you who suffer from this "disease". But rest assured: it is not enough to heal them. As a friend, the best treatment is to take him or her to a psychologist to get him or her back to a healthy life.
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